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Going for a drive 1

Going for a drive

Schizo: Nice car. Yours?
Laura: No, not mine. A friend of mine lets me use it.
Schizo: I wish I had friends like that.
Laura: I'm actually doing her a favor. You see, I took this one to draw the paparazzis away and she took the less conspicuous one to go where she wanted to go unnoticed.
Schizo: I don't see any paparazzis.
Laura: They took off after they realized their mistake. Worked long enough, though.

Going for a drive 2

Going for a drive

Nikki: Will you take me for a drive? Please! Pleeeease!
Laura: Sure, as you're asking so nicely. I'm in no hurry. I mean, if it's all right with Schizo.
Schizo: I'm sure Jet wouldn't mind.
Nikki: Mom? She'll be green with envy once I tell her about this. She's been wanting a car like this for ages.
Laura: All right, hop in then!

Going for a drive 3

Going for a drive

Schizo: Take it easy. No speeding and don't be too long.
Nikki: Stop fussing, uncle Schizo, it'll be all right. Mom's not going to be back in hours.
Schizo: I thought you wanted to go to movies.
Nikki: Forget movies, this is thousand times better!

Going for a drive 4

Going for a drive

Nikki: Come on, let's go! Step on it!
Laura: Watch your mouth, little girl. - Don't worry Schizo, we won't be gone too long.
Schizo: I'll be in the bar over there.
Laura: Then I guess we'll have to be back fairly quick, so you won't have time to get too drunk.

Going for a drive 5

Going for a drive

Laura: How do you like it so far?
Nikki: I love it! Can't we go any faster?
Laura: All right, a bit faster, but Schizo...
Nikki: He's a spoilsport. He always does all kinds of nasty things, but wouldn't let others...

Going for a drive 6

Going for a drive

Nikki: Watch out!!!
Laura: Eeeeek!
Nikki: Eeeeek!

Going for a drive 7

Going for a drive

Nikki: Nice braking. I didn't know you can stop this thing so quickly. What do you think, did we hit him? I can't look in case there's blood or something.
Laura: Where did he come from? He was not supposed to be here.
Nikki: Should we take a look? You look, I don't want to see.

Going for a drive 8

Going for a drive

John: Ladies, you're supposed to watch where you're driving.
Nikki: You're alive!
Laura: I'm so glad you're all right! I thought I hit you.
John: You didn't. I just fell for braking too hard. I'm fine. No need to call the police or anything.
Nikki: Why would we call the police? If we had hit you, we'd be calling an ambulance.
John: I'm happy to hear that. However, the police could be interested in reckless driving.
Laura: I'm sure they would be interested in you. I hope you know this road is for motorvehicles only, that's why there's that wall. The cycling path is on the other side.

Going for a drive 9

Going for a drive

John: Are you saying you know things better than law enforcement?
Laura: What do you mean?
John: Let me introduce myself, agent John Williams.
Nikki: Agent? Are you a spy? Like James Bond?
Laura: Nikki, I don't think a spy would introduce himself as an agent.
John: FBI.
Nikki: Oh.
Laura: Fed or not, you're the one who broke the law.

Going for a drive 10

Going for a drive

Nikki: You've got a nice bike. The sheriff said uncle Schizo should get a bike, because after the next accident he'll lose his license.
John: Next accident?
Nikki: He's had so many we lost count. The sheriff's mad about all the damage to property. After uncle Schizo crashed into the police car, the sheriff called him a public nuisance. Tee hee.
Laura: Nikki, I'm sure agent Williams...
John: John.
Laura: ...John has better things to do than listen to you chatter.
John: On the contrary, I find it very entertaining.
Nikki: See, not everybody thinks I talk too much.

Going for a drive 11

Going for a drive

Laura: We need to go now. Nikki's babysitter is waiting for us.
Nikki: Goodbye, John. Will we see you again?
John: Who knows? It's not a very big city.
Nikki: You can come to the theater, if you want to see us. Laura works there and I'm there sometimes, because uncle Schizo performs there.
Laura: Nikki, hush. Goodbye, John. Try not to get yourself killed. Find the cycling path.
John: I will. Goodbye.

Going for a drive 12

Going for a drive

Nikki: He was kinda cute.
Laura: Maybe, but no fashion sense whatever. Did you see what he was wearing?
Nikki: So what? You can change the clothes, but not the face.
Laura: True.

Hello Kitty 1

Hello Kitty

Schizo: Hi girls, what's up? And who's this?
Nikki: This is Kitty. We're helping her to get extra pretty for the school dance.
Schizo: Well, hello Kitty. I'm Schizo.
Kitty: Hi, I've heard about you. Nikki told me you can do magic tricks.
Schizo: That's right, I do it for living. Unfortunately, I don't know any tricks for making little girls prettier, so you'll just need to rely on Nikki and Laura.

Hello Kitty 2

Hello Kitty

Schizo: So, Emma, what's with the outfit? Going to a costume party?
Emma: No, I'm Kitty's date.
Schizo: Really? That could be a problem. After all, you're not a guy.
Kitty: Nobody at my school knows Emma, so they won't notice anything. They're much too thick for that. Actually, that's why I don't have a date and asked Emma.
Laura: And the outfit will throw them off guard for sure. Isn't it great?
Schizo: It's certainly... different. Do you think it's proper for a dance?
Emma: In my dad's country, it's good enough for the president's independence day party, so it better be good enough for a school dance.

Hello Kitty 3

Hello Kitty

Nikki: There, all finished. What do you think?
Schizo: Very nice, but Laura, aren't you ever getting tired with those fake heart-shaped birthmarks?
Laura: Why would I? It's very stylish.
Kitty: I think it's great. I'm sure nobody else has one like it.
Schizo: I'm sure they won't. Well, have fun and let's hope Emma's cover won't be blown.
Emma: Don't worry, as long as I'm keeping my pants on, nobody will be able to tell the difference.

Icebat's problem 1

Icebat's problem

Schizo: What's the matter with you?
Icebat: I'm a failure. - You know how Icebats are supposed to love cold and snow and stuff?
Schizo: Yes, so?
Icebat: The other day, I went out and it was freezing and that icky white stuff was everywhere and sun wasn't shining...
Schizo: And you didn't like it and that's why you think you're a failure as an Icebat?
Icebat: Yeah. I know I should just try to get used to it, but...
Schizo: At last! A sane Icebat!
Icebat: What?
Schizo: You heard what I said. Just think of it, you're warm here, you've got the tree and cookies and booze. Why would you want to stay outside and freeze yourself to death? - Have I ever told you about Chilly Willy? No? Well, I think it's about time...

Icebat's problem 2

Icebat's problem

Icebat: So it's okay to be an Icebat and not like going outdoors?
Schizo: Certainly. It's all the other ones, who need their heads examined. Feeling better now?
Icebat: Sure. You mentioned booze...
Schizo: Say no more. I'll be right back.

Icebat's problem 3

Icebat's problem

Schizo: Here's to sanity and staying warm while others are freezing their nuts off!
Icebat: Oops! Watch your language in front of the kid.
Nikki: Look what Laura gave me!
Schizo: Looks dangerous, but of course, those are the best presents.
Nikki: It's not dangerous. You know cats always land on their feet.
Schizo: Just make sure you won't go skateboarding with a sandwich.
Nikki: Huh?
Schizo: Nothing. Bad joke.

Icebat's problem 4

Icebat's problem

Nikki: Can I have some too?
Schizo: Sorry, you're too young. In a few years, maybe.
Nikki: Oh, come on, just a little!
Schizo: Not worth the risk. Jet would kill me, if she found out.
Icebat: And she would. She's got eyes in the back of her head.
Nikki: No, she doesn't. Mom's not a freak.
Schizo: Just a figure of speech. There's cola in the kitchen. You can have some of that.
Icebat: And there's cupcakes and cookies and donuts. Lots of them!

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